Why I am as I am?

Even my close friends ask me why I am as I am?  So I also started thinking about it, is it really I am weird like hanged over marijuana? I am confident a time then dumb a time, sometimes so easily talking sometimes numb on the situation in the dilemma what to say now? And then sometimes that fragments of comment, hunts me deep inside that I go mute. What comment? No confidence, so dumb, silent, mute, boring, egotist and more.

I studied well. No, I only studied well and when came out to the real world I understood world need more than a well-studied person? The world needs one who can talk, who can talk more than just kaam wali batein ( work related talk). Who can mingle with people because networking matters. You have to smile always, meet people talk people who know the person you choose to sit for breakfast today morning will become your co-co-founder.

And as I don’t have that personality I am the outsider. So, here are few things, as you say, I should do:

  1. Look in the mirror and say you can do it.
  2. Mingle with people
  3. laugh and hang out with people
  4. Until and unless you will talk how will you express
  5. Sit with random people for dinner, breakfast, and lunch.
  6. You need to talk to survive here.


And here are few what few good people in my life say whenever I lose confident

Be yourself and give your best.

Invest in you.

Be best in what you are doing.

That’s all.

I am as I am because of the past event in my life that are imprinted in subconscious memory. And I have become one I am. Who you are as an adult mostly depends on how you was shaped in childhood. If you can relate this, sometimes I feel a vague line how I could have been if people would have appreciated instead of demotivating.  And that is instantaneous I have no control when and why it crosses my mind.

How anyone is, have some background. So, before judging try to know about that story they are in.

Mirror and girl

Google image

4 thoughts on “Why I am as I am?

  1. I am what I am
    I am also a result of my past events
    Some love me as I am
    Few judge me the way I am
    But then I have come a long way
    Seen practically smart men
    Experienced sugar coated few
    But every one chiseled me in their own way
    Fee polished me with their soothing & caring touch
    In the end I am
    What I am
    And happy with
    How I am
    Su 😊😍

    Liked by 1 person

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